Expectations

Never fear, blog world! I have not forgotten about my inaugural Bachelorette blog. I have just been distracted.

Work has been going well. I have found a new ally in our intern, Von. Our days involve me explaining how to do tasks and why they are done that way, and answering his questions, and then talking about Big Bang Theory. Von is awesome.

Have you ever watched an infant that refuses to crawl, but keeps trying to run? They can pretend they have some sense of equilibrium for brief periods of time. Maybe they can even make you believe that they are in control of their balance. That they can really run. Until they try to move and everything comes crashing down.

Sometimes grownups are like that too.

They can appear to have it all together. They can put on a great show. But if you don't crawl first, you can't run. If you try to run, everything you've worked for will come crashing down in an instant. It's incredibly frustrating to watch. But, it's because we allow ourselves to believe the charade. Our expectations are that it will be true. When those expectations fall short, it can seem heartbreaking. This explains how I'm feeling.

Mother's Day Mayhem

I feel like I have been beaten up.

On Friday, Cory asked me how many hours I had logged this week. We spent much more time together than we normally do this week, since Steph and Terri are both off, and he guessed that I'd be getting close to overtime. Close yes, but not in the danger zone. I was saved by the extended lunch break I took on Monday. [A happy coincidence: we had over scheduled front staff, and I felt miserable with a nagging headache. I gladly agreed to leave with the hope of a break and a hot meal providing some relief before coming back for the evening with the back staff.]

I was also watching Terri's dog while she was recovering from surgery. A dog that is a) a puppy b) hyperactive, to say the least! and c) insists on waking up at 5am. To say that I was overworked and sleep deprived this week is an understatement. Then I realized that I only have one day off the next three weeks: Memorial Day (+ Sundays, because we are closed.) No days off + a lot of laundry that still needs put away + more laundry that still needs washed + dishes + ... The list goes on.

Then there is that whole Amendment 1 thing. You may have heard of it, but in case you've been living under a rock, you can read about it here. I think the homosexual debate is quite complicated and I don't feel inclined to delve into my personal feelings on that right now. After the law was passed, friends on both sides of the debate let the comments fly. One friend in particular called me quite upset, on the verge of tears, about how the idea of marriage between homosexuals is so wrong. It was a Matthew 7 moment:

“Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ when all the time there is a plank in your own eye? You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye." -Matthew 7:3-5

The Bible plainly states that God intended for man and woman to be together and that homosexuality is at odds with God's plan for us. Yet, there are things this friend is doing in their life that are also contrary to what is said in the Bible. I don't feel that I am currently in the place to pass judgment or offer council. I don't think I can offer words to inspire change, and am afraid of offering words that merely cause defense and hurt. So I wait and trust that things will happen according to God's plan.


And to cap off the week of crazy work, lack of sleep, Saturday was date night. After date night I had grand thoughts of finalizing my Sunday School lesson, maybe folding some laundry and going to bed early. Instead, I got home, was tackled by my nephew Andrew (and later by Christian) who was surprising Mom for Mother's Day. We stayed up until midnight when I finally couldn't take it anymore and went to bed. Overslept, but still found time to sort of get my lesson in order. Then we went to my grandmother's house for lunch, and of course had to see all the cows, roosters, and the billy goat. Then Lucius and I took a nap, because nephews wear. us. out.!!!


I'm still feeling not so great, but I think this crazy week has inspired some good things. Here's a sneak peak to inspire you:

#1. Awe, don't they look cute? Bachelor Brad Womack proposed to Emily Maynard during his second stint as The Bachelor. Well they broke up and now the Emily is back to be The Bachelorette. Everyone knows that Albert Einstein is a pretty smart guy. And everyone knows that he said: "Insanity: doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results." Everyone except for those people who decide to look for love on National Television, ABC style of course. This season get ready. You'll all get to witness what my boyfriend calls "Monday-Morning Quarterbacking" - Bachelor style. The past few seasons seem to be getting progressively worse, but I can't bring myself to stop watching. This season I'm going to make the most of this glutton-for-punishment quality: I'm going to blog about the episodes and breakdown these "love connections." What are they doing right? What are they doing wrong? Should these relationships even be categorized as love, as God intended it?

 

#2. Back to that Matthew 7:3-5 thing: Let's take a look at the common life. aka mine. What am I doing right? What am I doing wrong? How am I failing as a Christian? Will a change in habits make a drastic change in my general outlook?

 Stay tuned blog-world!!!

God's Plan

As I'm getting ready to go to a Church meeting, which I am not looking forward to because we have difficult decisions ahead.

This popped up on my facebook newsfeed because my friend subscribes to Life and Love and gets their updates:

And today's Our Daily Bread devotional comes from 1 John:

^"This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers and sisters. If anyone has material possessions and sees a brother or sister in need but has no pity on them, how can the love of God be in that person? Dear children, let us not love with words or speech but with actions and in truth.

This is how we know that we belong to the truth and how we set our hearts at rest in his presence: If our hearts condemn us, we know that God is greater than our hearts, and he knows everything.  Dear friends, if our hearts do not condemn us, we have confidence before God  and receive from him anything we ask, because we keep his commands and do what pleases him.  And this is his command: to believe in the name of his Son, Jesus Christ, and to love one another as he commanded us." -1 John 3:16-23

If that isn't encouragement for days like today, I don't know what is! If nothing else, hopefully this will help keep me in the appropriate mindset. The road ahead will be difficult, but I shouldn't worry because it's all part of God's plan. All I can do is [try to] keep His commandments and glorify Him!

Unexpected

“Nobody says you must laugh, but a sense of humor can help you overlook the unattractive, tolerate the unpleasant, cope with the unexpected, and smile through the day” -Ann Landers



6 months to the day. for serious.
you have got to be kidding.

now, before I get carried away with irrational emotion, [okay, maybe after I initially experienced some intense emotions] I decided to find a list of qualities that people describe in "good" men. Google it, there are lots of them. Or just go here to expand upon this immediate study:

1. He treats you well

2. He is a man of his word

3. He loves you inside and out

4. He has a bright future

5. He is able to guide and protect you

6. He is confident in himself

7. He is an independent man

8. He is appreciative of you

9. He speaks and acts honestly

10. He has good morality

in the event that you read this, and in case you were wondering,
you're 3 for 10.