Still

I am still cleaning, still purging. Slowly but surely reducing the amount of things I own. the things that I put energy into. The catch is embracing where I am in life and who I am in this season vs who I have been. Finding my identity in my potential, as a Christian, as a woman, and as a being, vs in the things I own. I've been having an internal debate dialogue about my textbooks. Should I sell them? Donate them? Keep them? What would be the point of keeping them? Will I actually ever use them again? The answer? I will probably never use them again. I'm not sure grad school is in my future. If it is, the books will probably be outdated. If I'm not sold on grad school, why would I bother keeping them? I think I still derive so much of my identity from school, despite having graduated nearly three years ago. Our society is so focused on what we do. It's all about our careers and how we make money. How much money we make. Not how we treat people, or how we enrich our lives with meaningful things. We obsess over the stock market and 401Ks and retirement. On bettering our lives in the future - but at the cost of diminishing our lives now. At least that's how things look from my perspective.

I have today off. I'm looking forward to it. To getting rid of yet more stuff. To challenging myself and hopefully opening myself up for growth, and shifted perspectives for the future. What's important vs what's not. Of embracing and focusing on what I can control or change, and not being distracted by things I cannot control. God has a plan for me, even when I don't know what it is.